Ghostbusters
by outerelf
Summary: -"Who you gonna call? GHOSTBUSTERS!" Of course, they were the ghost busters, not giant alien robot busters...


It was a decrepit old firehouse, sitting on the corner of the street, looking worn down and run down. Many of the neighbors spoke of it in haughty tones, dismissing it and the people that worked inside.

A single sign, its paint already beginning to peel and paint despite how new it was, held a single word. "GHOSTBUSTERS"

-------

Peter Venkman, a small man with brown hair, brown eyes, an face that he was sure attracted the ladies, was tapping the table impatiently as he studied the woman across from him

She was around forty years old, dressed in the slum clothing that was loose and slightly ratty, and had the weight of a sedentary life-style that made one want to flinch in pain every time one pudgy white hand drew close to you. Her voice raspy at best, and at the moment he was hearing it at the worst, which was screaming her lungs out.

"You do not take that tone with me young man! I was around before you were even born! All I came here was to get your help from this so called 'ghost-hunting' business!"

"Ma'm." Peter said as patiently, and as smoothly as he could muster, "I must ask for you to tell me what's going on." Privately he was grateful that the rest of the team was out chasing down the poltergeist currently wrecking havoc in the Statue of Liberty. No doubt the woman would freak is she saw them...

"I'll tell you what's going on! I was just taking care of my children, when this car came zooming down the road! It nearly hit my darling baby, and worst of all it had no driver! I thought it was just a run away car, when it turned around the corner, swerving to not hit any of the other cars! What kind of ghost would that be?"

"Sounds like it could be either a poltergeist of some sort, or maybe an apparition. Probably a poltergeist of a teen."

Peter glanced up, glowering at the tall, thin man with fuzzy black hair. Egon - no the entire team- were a gigantic mess. Ectoplasm splattered their clothing, and a smoking oblong box held in one hand confirmed his earlier thoughts. "Oh good. You're back."

The single African-American man standing in the group of three instantly placed his hand on Egon shoulder. "Come on Egon, let's not disturb Peter-"

Egon allowed himself to be led away, chattering with the fourth. "Ray, we need to upgrade our Proton Packs. I don't think that the batteries are running efficiently as they should be."

Ray, intrigued, murmured, "Maybe if we used a different radioactive material?"

The heavy set woman turned towards Peter with a dangerous look in her eyes. He smiled weakly, more grimacing then smiling, and said, "Now, where might you have seen that car?"

-----

Peter groaned as he sank down into the seat. Winston chuckled softly. "We've been staking out here for three nights. If a crazy car without a driver doesn't show up soon, I'm going to call it quits and tell the lady we got rid of it anyways."

"What happened to infinite patience you proclaimed to have?"

"Hey, I only have patience with hot chicks, and then they don't need patience, they need some loving! Ohh, that's a nice one."

As Peter stared longingly after the woman Winston silently shook his head, bringing his hand held radio up to his face. "Hey, Egon, Ray, see anything?"

Egon voice crackled back, "Negative."

"Negativ- Oh holy-" The rest was drowned out in a wave of static, before Rays voice broke over, "That car nearly ran me over! Egon, it's heading towards you! After it!"

Tires squealed across the radio, before three cars gunned their engines in response to the words, as they began to squeal towards where Ray had just reported after the car. Egons wild voice shouted across the link, "I see it! Ray help-"

As Egon spoke, the radio went dead. There was a moment of silence from both Peter and Winston, before Winston slammed the gas petal to the floor, fingers reaching for the switch to send off the sirens on top. Peter reached the switch first, and he grinned as the sirens loud, shrill scream pierced the night.

A car they both recognized as the rental that Ray had picked up screamed in beside them. Ray leaned out of the window, driving with one hand, shouting, "Egon is just ahead! Put on a little more speed-"

Winston eyes widened as a sharp curve appeared, and instantly he began applying the breaks, slowing down. Ray insanely kept going at his top speed, fishtailing around the curb, allowing the back light to hit a pole.

Peter muttered, "At least it's a rental." Winston smiled weakly, wondering yet again how he had become part of the crazy team.

"It's because you wanted a steady paycheck." Peter cackled, "Remember, Janine did ask you whether or not you believed in ghosts, UFO's and Atlantis!"

Winston would've glared at the smaller man if he had not been so busy attempting to keep Ray in sight as the man drove recklessly through traffic, leaving blaring horns and cursing drivers in his wake.

A black Cadillac Miller-Meteor slowly pulled into view, and Winston cursed as he realized that the car was not only faster, but probably more agile then the old baby he currently had in his hands.

That did leave the question of why it was actually obeying all traffic laws… Egon rental car pulled up next to the car, as Egon peered out the window at the car. His eyes narrowed, and Peter could practically see the calculations dancing through Egons head. "Hey, how did Egon catch up to the car?"

A yellow light appeared, and the car veered off to the right. Peter laughed maniacally. "Yes! He went down into a blind alley!"

Egon wasted no time in turning after, and Ray came dangerously close to slamming into another car as the car skidded badly into the alleyway.

The black car screamed to a halt, as it saw the tall wall tower over it. Egon slammed the breaks, and tumbled out of the car, pointing the proton packs wand at the car.

"Alright ghost, come on out!" Ray scrambled out of his car, sidling up to Egon. "Hey, Egon, I don't see a ghost, and there's no driver so it can't be a zombie… do you think it could be something else?"

"Possible. It concurs with the earlier activity-"

The car backed up a little, instantly both men powered up their packs, but still kept at bay, waiting for the ghost to reveal himself. They didn't think the owner of the car would be pleased to get a smoldering wreck out of car.

Ecto-one spun into view, as Peter leaned out of the window. "Oy, did we get the creepy car cornered?"

"Yeah…" Egon allowed his gun to loosen in his grip as he fished for an instrument clipped to his belt. "Where is it?" Egon muttered distractedly to himself, before at last finding it clipped where the Electrolyte Particle measurer usually was.

He extracted the small thing, before bringing it up to point at the car. "Umm, I think we may have a problem here."

"Problem? Readings off the scale?" Peter didn't look too happy as he said that, glancing at the car in horror. He didn't need another repeat of the Stay-Puft Marshmallow man.

"No. I'm getting no readings at all." As Egon spoke, Ray holstered his wand to turn to Egon. Peter kept his own wand leveled at the car, even as his head craned to see what the two were doing.

Winston kept both eyes on the car, tense and wary. He had seen several nasty ghosts, and one that wasn't appearing on the scale at all- "It doesn't look broken." Ray muttered. "Could it be wiring?"

"I-I don't think so, I could've sworn that I had just rechecked the wiring yesterday-" Egon began reaching for a screwdriver willingly giving the instrument up as Ray grabbed it out of his hands.

"Maybe if we switch it to a different frequency? Remember, that one ghost that used electrical currents to create those power outages?"

"Remember? It took me nearly three days to figure out how to reconfigure the flow of the proton packs to create a proper flow to capture it. You may be right though Ray." Egon began walking rapidly to Ecto-one, before pausing as a slight tingle crossed his skin. The instrument in Ray's hands began to click softly as the meter on the display rose. Ray, not noticing, called after Egon varied suggestions.

Egon waved a hand, before a laughing cackle swept across the alley way. All four men stiffened, and Ray jerked out his wand to point it at the source of the cackle as his eyes fell to the instrument. "It's not broken."

"I can see that Ray! Now where is that voice coming from?" Peter demanded, eyes swiping across the empty alley. Ray held up the instrument, pointing in different directions, watching the meter.

"Up there!" Egon pointed up at the wall above the car. "The ghost must be trying to escape-"

Winston brought up his gun, to shoot randomly. Peter brought his own up a moment later, making sure not to cross the streams as he too shot at the air. "Show yourself you stupid ghost-"

A sweep of cold air passed over their heads, as a woman dressed in blue swept across over them. Egon spun on his feet, nearly tripping as he fired. The woman screamed as the ray caught, pinning itself around her like a lasso.

Ray fumbled for a moment scrambling for a ghost containment device. A moment later the black oblong box slid beneath the ghost. "Look away!" Ray warned for a brief moment and Egons head ducked as Ray slammed his foot down on the release.

Swirling white light rose, capturing the ghost within its unrelenting grip. The ghost screamed once, before the light brought it into the box, and the trap closed. "Bagged and ready for the containment center!"

Ray reeled in the box as the four men gathered together, slapping each other on the back. "Good job Ray. We'll charge the woman for it, and maybe even pad the bill a little-"

"Peter!" Winston began to protest, when Peter winked, smirking slightly. "Peter- that is absolutely unethical of you. Besides, the woman never did anything wrong to you."

"Ha- the banshees we've captured are usually quieter then her. Besides, you're not the one who had to put up with her."

A polite voice interrupted, "Excuse me, but what are banshees?"

All four turned, Ray still holding the slightly smoking box in one hand. "What? Who just spoke?" One of them asked, eyes darting around the empty alley.

"I did."

Ray, Peter and Egon looked at each other, as Winston rubbed his eyes. "The car spoke, didn't it?"

"Some new ghost activity maybe?"

"No- I am not a ghost. I am a Neutral, from the planet Cybertron. I came here, trying to flee the war-"

"Oh, brand new one. I never expected to meet an insane ghost." The brightly conversational tone threw the giant robot off for a moment.

"I am not a ghost! I am what you could call an alien!"

"Would you mind coming out of the car then?" Peter asked sweetly, smiling, fingers tightening upon the wands handle. The ghost comes out, he'd zap them- and they could 'ethically' pad the bill for the two captures.

There was a moment of silence, before the voice said flatly, "I see you don't believe me. Very well then-"

The car moved forward an inch, giving itself clearance, before metal twisted, wires rearranged, and in a moment, a giant, (definitely alien) robot stood before them. Its helm tilted to one side in an obviously mimicked gesture, as it repeated, voice amazingly soft for something so big, "I am a Neutral Transformer."

Peter stared up at it, before turning to Egon. "Do we have a fee for something like this?"

"No, I was not aware that aliens were on our list of what we captured. I'm very certain it was only ghosts."

Peter glanced at Ray and Egon, both of whom nodded solemnly. "Very well then, it's agreed. We aren't going to bother it any further. Let's go home."

The transformer watched, optics dimming, as the men retreated to their cars, Peter beginning to gripe about crazy women and how high their octave ranges could go. Egon muttered about the various problems of the newest invention, and Ray worriedly eyed the trashed car.

Each drove off, leaving behind the silent alien robot, before a single optic ridge rose, and the Transformer grumbled under his vocalizer about being crazy, before folding down into a car, and driving off into the night.

-_-_-_-_-

Peter yawned broadly as he slid down the pole into the garage, bypassing the two cars without a second thought. He reached into the locker holding his uniforms, muttering under his breath about spare change. Through a mirror he could see the two Ecto-ones sitting side by side.

Still it refused to register.

Yawning again, he stumbled off, carrying his soiled uniforms, peering blearily at the calendar. The day, circled in red and marked with big lettering, proclaimed today was officially 'rest' day. Janine had told them in no uncertain terms that she would not be coming to work today, so that meant they were all forced to take a holiday.

Peter yawned, and shuffled on into the room that held the washing machine, flipping open the lid. The reflective surface showed the two cars, still sitting calmly side by side. Without bothering to look, he dumped the clothing in, added soap, and started the machine up.

The man proceeded to do the morning shuffle into the nearby kitchen, bypassing the two cars completely. Peter could've sworn he heard a muted beep of a horn, before ignoring it completely as some early morning idiotic driver.

With a grumble he flipped open the fridge door, peering blearily at different items. A hand reached out to grab a milk carton. The cap was quickly unscrewed, and Peter drank directly out of the jug without a second thought.

Feeling very much refreshed, he turned around- and the jug crashed onto the floor, shattering into a thousand different pieces, milk snaking out to form cold puddles on the floor. The sleepy man stared at the two Ectos. "What the H-"

The engine of one of the Ectos' filled the room, as the voice from last night spoke softly, "I am curious about what you do. I hope you don't mind me staying."

* * *

_a/n: Yes, this is not posted as a crossover. In two days I will place it in its proper category. This was inspired by part by Johnny216, posted here: .com/art/Ecto-1-23027323_

_It's just a little oneshot, and I hope Ghostbuster fans don't string me up for how badly I did characterizations. The button labeled review is calling your name..._


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